El Clásico

30 Nov

“So m(o)uch Barça (…for so little Madrid)”

Iker wailed: “But… Offside!”

Xavi hugged a friend.

Real Madrid were all but undone after Xavi’s 9th minute goal, while Barça supporters were just getting cozy in their seats.  The only thing that could have been better than a 0-0 stalemate in this battle of La Liga’s twin evil halves was an absolute shellacking of the Real Madrid’s “chosen ones”.  Let’s face it: Real Madrid are more fun to watch in defeat than a lot of other teams are in victory.  After each of the five goals, as the cameras had finished with the hugs and highlights, the faces of the Mou Team were not unlike raindrops on roses. Shots of sad Christy Ronda are worth a thousand smiles.

Marca, in their once-a-year dog pile, reserved only two punches for anyone but their own.  One was delivered to Iturralde González who saw Cristiano challenged by Valdés for a divided ball.  He was not willing to barf straight through his whistle hole and make the call.  The second flailing left hook was for Piqué and the Barcelona fans who held up five fingers toward the end of the match.  “The Culés put on a show, but they enjoyed it too much,” is an entry-level Marca gripe.

Also present on the cover: Cristiano’s shove heard ’round the world of Guardiola, Florentino’s replacement for the injured Higuaín, and a hedgehog selling car insurance.

Move along, people.  Nothing to see here.


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